The Dry Heave is Not a New Dance Move

You know those questions that you don't ask because you don't want to know the answer?
I had one of those on Wednesday.

I was so desperate, in fact, not to know the answer that I carried the question around with me from 6:30am until 3:30pm.

It was the first day of school, and whereas I'm usually all "woohoo! yippie!", I was more like "I WISH FOR DEATH. AND SLEDGEHAMMERS."

I did not want the answer mostly because I knew what the answer would be.

Q: Why does my head feel like a rhino it sitting on top of it?
Q: Why am I expelling big, bloody, phlegm people from my mouth?
Q: Why am I lurching into the toilet between classes?

A: Because, my friend, you, after 19 consecutive happy-go-lucky first days of school filled with rainbows and butterflies and pink pony pee, have the flu.

**yes, Evie is vaccinated; no, obviously I was not. let the finger-pointing and name calling ensue**

So I am drinking Nyquil in such copious amounts that its legality is questionable. But it makes me feel so good...and it turns my dizzies from the imma-gonna-vomit-on-your-face kind to the feels-like-im-jumping-on-the-bed-but-im-not kind. And that is always a good thing. Real good.


Deanie said...

Hope you are feeling better soon! It's good to see you have not lost your witty ways, in spite of "less than stellar" health!

JuliAnna said...

Hope you feel better really soon. Laughter is always the best cure.


chai am woman said...

Nyquil might be one of God's top three best gifts to the Earth. Right behind baby cheeks and chai lattes. Get well soon!