5.20.2008

The Great Equalizer

Graham and I watch a show called "American Gladiator" on Monday nights. At the end of the final obstacle course there is this uphill treadmill-type-apparatus that they call "The Great Equalizer" because of its' ability to trip up even the most formidable of athletes. This got me thinking about all of the great equalizers in life. For me one thing stands out.

Headgear. Headgear should come with a large sign (of the neon colored variety) that says: "warning, you are about to forfeit every ounce of social confidence you ever had (which, in middle school, is almost none) and be subjected to cruel teasing and mocking every day."

There was a girl who served as this warning label for me. When given the choice to wear headgear during the day for one month or only at night for six months she chose the former. Bad idea. The worst decision a 6th grader could ever make. Once I was faced with that decision, after having watched her suffer for 30 days, I (hurriedly, and with conviction) chose to wear my headgear only at night.

I did not wear my headgear to sleepovers; the only person I would wear it in front of was Kristen, my best friend, because she had headgear too. We had this whole "headgear language" that only we, the speaking-impaired lispers, could understand...but I will not go into that. Reliving the main points of this experience is plenty painful enough. I woke up every morning for half of a year with drool crusted to each side of my face. This was due to the "increased, uncontrollable salivating" that resulted from wearing headgear. Headgear even looks like a not-so-modern day torture device.

What has served, for each of you, as the greatest slice of humble pie in your life? What is your "great equalizer"?

2 comments:

chaimaretto said...

this is a great one. my best friend had to wear a "lip bumper" for four months before she got her braces. you can only imagine what that looked like. mine definitely has to be the rubber bands i had to wear with my braces. at one point, i actually had to wear a rubber band diagonally across the front of my mouth. it was definitely one of my more attractive phases... :/

Mom said...

Head gear, braces, acne, glasses ... none of these can compare to the greatest earthly "equalizer" ... CHILDREN!

Love mine with all my heart and soul!